January Coping Mechanisms

January can feel like a very long thirty-one days. It is perhaps the most tiring month of all. Being honest, I’ve found it a struggle. Depression, coupled with unrelenting pain from fibromyalgia, has led to many sleepless hours overnight. I wake most mornings feeling utterly defeated. I know others who have had a quite horrendous month. Within our circle of close family and friends, we’ve had two funerals, an accident and emergency admission, and two thefts (one of them fairly large) … that I know of. And the thing with depression is that it doesn’t ease off, even when I feel I have no particular reason to be under the influence. Even when I know there are others whose very existence has been changed forever. And not in a way they would have chosen. 

I know the feelings won’t last forever. And to try to support myself through this, and – I hope – to help others, I’ve been looking into various coping mechanisms.

Exercise

Firstly, exercise. This often tops the list of actions which can be taken to ease depression, as well as fibromyalgia. Gentle walking helps towards the 10,000 steps a day, and contributes towards overall health. Aerobic activity raises the heart rate and encourages deeper breathing, which combine to improve wellbeing in myriad ways. These include:

• releasing endorphins (which can help to reduce pain, and produce a feeling of euphoria),
• increasing oxygen flow (which in turn helps organs to work more efficiently), and
• helping blood cleansing by increasing circulation.

My own walks tend to be stressful. With a reactive dog (nervous of other canines), an excitable dog, and a toddler in the back-pack, it feels like quite an expedition. I’m on high alert at all times, watching out for other dog walkers, and keeping an eye on our two dogs. It also takes a lot out of me physically. However, a short walk around the block after my husband returns from work, is much less stressful. It offers me some time alone, to enjoy the fresh air and the chance to think. While I don’t always feel motivated to step out, it really helps.   

[Side note, if you’re interested in the origin of the 10,000 steps target, there’s an article about it here. It dates back to 1964!]  

Rest

Next, rest. It’s important to pace yourself, whatever your background. With an illness such as fibromyalgia or chronic fatigue syndrome, it’s even more necessary. A day of heavy activity needs to be balanced with sufficient rest. Activity doesn’t have to be physical, it can include just being around people. That’s where the bipolar (or potentially any form of mental ill health) comes in. Interacting with people is tiring, and can sometimes be exhausting. Finding time to rest isn’t easy, but it’s essential to take time to recover.

Diet

Diet is another area which impacts on overall health, including feelings of tiredness. Fatigue can become depressing in itself; it’s demoralising wanting to do things but failing to summon the energy. I think we eat fairly healthily at home, with regular fresh food, and many meals prepared from scratch. Apparently gluten containing foods can contribute to fatigue. Removing gluten completely is quite a challenge, but I’m going to try to cut down and see whether that helps.

Finally

Final thought for this post is to remember that hidden illnesses such as fibromyalgia and depression are real conditions. It can be very hard to ask for help. At times when getting out of bed feels too difficult, interacting with others is likely to be towards the bottom of the list of things you want to do. Try to be honest with those who are closest to you though; they might not be able to fix how you’re feeling, but will understand. And importantly, they will also realise that your lack of interest in venturing out of bed isn’t something you (or they) can overcome with a quick remedy.

By asking for support when you need it, the journey back to a brighter place will be smoother. Out of all of the advice I have come across, this is the hardest. If you find it difficult to reach out too, there are helplines which may be helpful in learning how to talk about how you feel. I’ve listed some of these below, which offer a range of levels of support and advice.

Support

Samaritans (always available, calls are free): 116 123

Shout (always available to offer text support to those in crisis – the service is anonymous and free): text SHOUT to 85258 

Fibromyalgia Action UK (Monday – Friday 10:00 am to 4:00 pm): 0300 999 3333 

Action on Pain (Monday – Friday 10:00 am to 4:00 pm): 0345 6031593

Further contact suggestions are available on the National Mind directory page here.