Through the Eyes of a Child

Watching our son as he slept the other day, a cold realisation swept over me. If he and I live our lives into old age, then one day I will leave him here. Alone. Well, ‘alone’ might be inaccurate, but the thought that I won’t be here to support him any longer gives me cause to reflect. I’d love to see how his story unfolds. To be there in person, or at the end of email or telephone when he needs me. To tell him it will be okay, that he’s doing extraordinary things with his life, how proud I am of him. That I love him. But the truth is, that I probably won’t be around to see all of this. It brings to mind an ABBA song, ‘Slipping Through My Fingers’. A parent reflects on their daughter as she grows up. The lyrics include the lines …

“What happened to the wonderful adventures
The places I had planned for us to go
Well, some of that we did, but most we didn’t
And why, I just don’t know”

I have so many adventures planned with our son. Star gazing during the summer; lying side by side to observe the clear skies and the Milky Way. Exploring the Highlands and taking boats over to the Islands, where my husband and I spent our honeymoon. Walking the dogs, and nature watching together. Reading books by torchlight in a tent pitched in the garden, and later making up ghost stories while we create shadow puppets on the canvas around us.

He’s too young for these adventures yet, but it’s easy to overlook the fact that even though he’s just 14 months old, each day is a new experience for him. And for me. When we wake, we wake to a day unlived. When his eyes open each morning, he greets us with a smile. Looking at life through his eyes, everything is an adventure; he takes it all in. Part of my role as a parent is to support him through these times, and introduce him to new experiences. However long we have together, and I hope we have many years with him, we can make every day a journey of discovery. 

I took him to TWIGS Community Gardens the other day. Somewhere I have visited many times before, but a new location for our boy. From the colours of the flowers, to the inquisitive chickens, to the enormous fish … there was much to entrance him. Watching his face light up as the chickens came close, scratching around in the dirt and clucking to one and other, I reminded myself that this was all new to him. Seeing his smile as the fish circled, watching us curiously, I imagined the environment from his perspective, through the eyes of a child. His mind and senses set to receive. Fearless and fascinated. We weren’t far from home, but for him, this was an entirely new world.

We plan ahead, it would be foolish not to. We also have hopes for the future (perhaps even dreams). But looking at things through the eyes of a child, we can see once again the possibilities within each day. No more waiting for tomorrow, today is when our time counts for the most, both for ourselves and for those we spend the time with. Carpe Diem.